I thought I would take a second to answer a handful of questions we’ve gotten more than once. Again, I’m not a foster expert. I’m also just a regular mama out here trying to do my best. I’m a fan of questions about almost everything (within reason, of course), Blake, SMA, end of life care, carrier testing, family planning, fostering, because you won’t know unless you ask.
Are you afraid to foster? Are you afraid to welcome a child into your home? Yes. I think if we weren’t a little bit scared we would be abnormal. The unknown of the whole process is probably the biggest fear.
Since you lost a child, doesn’t it make you angry at bio parents who make choices that put their kids in care? This is a yes and no. I’m angry at anyone who isn’t taking care of a child who is completely innocent and helpless. I also understand that most of the people who make these choices are not healthy and happy. They’ve come from backgrounds and circumstances that I don’t understand. Losing Blake definitely taught me compassion for everyone, even those who don’t deserve it. Does it still make me angry? Yes. Jeff’s response is a little different on this one.
Why don’t you just adopt? The need for foster parents is great. We feel like we can meet that need, right now, in a small way. So why not? Adoption might happen in the future or it might not.
How will your living children respond? This is a big unknown since we aren’t there yet. In all the talks we’ve had with Kenley she is very excited and open to the idea. However, she is 4. I don’t think I need to say more. Ayla is 13 months and a feisty little thing. I know it will be an adjustment, especially for her.
Would you have fostered if you never met Blake? No. Before I knew Blake I had no idea what I was capable of as a mother or what we were capable of as family. She has given us the courage to do something we never would’ve before she came into the world.
If you’ve got more, let me know!