A very kind person made a comment to me the other day. She had looked at some of my Facebook photos and then said, “I’m so glad to see you are happy now after all you’ve been through.” That one really got me thinking. How do you measure happiness? Smiling for a photo? Laughing at… Continue reading Happy now?
This space of mine has been neglected lately. Between home life, my day job and The Sunshine Co., I feel like I’m going in a million directions. There are so many things that will stop me in my tracks because of my grief. So far, one of those things just happens to be dates. Today,… Continue reading Diagnosis day take 3
This time last year, we started fundraising for the annual Cure SMA Walk-n-Roll that happens in our area. CureSMA is an organization we were introduced to shortly after Blake’s diagnosis. They do a lot of important and helpful things for families like ours during their most difficult times, all while passionately trying to find a… Continue reading Team Blake
A year ago today, Jeff, Blake and I sat in an exam room at Seattle Children’s Hospital. I was holding my sweet baby girl as she was falling asleep. We were alone, waiting for the doctors to come back in. They were going to tell me something I already knew. They were going to tell… Continue reading Diagnosis day
It was this time last year when doctors finally started listening to me. We got confirmation, after what felt like forever, that something “wasn’t normal (I hate this word)” with Blake’s development. Facebook has been reminding me of appointments, cryptic worry and all the unknowns during that time. It brings up more questions like, “Why… Continue reading A year ago
For multiple reasons, I try to avoid talking about some things on here. I don’t want to make people feel worse for us. I want to show there are positives that still happen and I’m still grateful, always. Greater than my desire to show positives, though, is my trying to remain truthful. My struggle is,… Continue reading What is it like?
As soon as Blake was a couple months old, I knew she was special. Shortly before she was diagnosed with SMA, I knew that her life would mean more than I ever could have imagined. After the reality of her diagnosis, I also knew I would never stop trying to show people all that I… Continue reading The Sunshine Company
Tonight I went into Kenley’s room to fold her laundry. I’ve always been much better about doing my girls’ laundry than mine or Jeff’s. Sorting, washing, folding – I dislike the entire process. I started folding her clothes, realizing because of the weather change she has so many new ones. I was looking at labels… Continue reading Laundry
I had an appointment with my grief therapist the other day. I haven’t seen her in a couple weeks because of Kenley’s leg and going back to work. She started asking me questions and I unloaded. I didn’t realize I had so many things to say. I told her I couldn’t understand why so many… Continue reading Fine
It’s unbelievable our Blake is actually gone. It’s still hard to believe SMA came into our lives and took my innocent baby girl. It’s hard to believe this happened to my family. But it did; it happened to us. It happened to me. I used to read a lot of tragic stories and think to… Continue reading Nightmare